The Forgotten Pages
by Aphina
Summary: A series of mini stories that never made it into Simply Devine or Devine Intervention. Part Two: The Way That She Died - Flack's reaction to when she slipped away.
1. Part One: True Colours

**AN: Hey all! This is a compilation of things that didn't make it into Simply Devine or Devine Intervention. Some of them are ideas I played with or chapters I wrote and didn't post for one reason or another. I was routing through my writing box and getting ready for the move when I found them.**

**Anyway there's quite a few of these some in singular chapters and others in sections. I hope you enjoy.**

**This chapter is what happened that night between Carmen and her Tanglewood ex husband Mathew.**

The Forgotten Pages- Part One: True Colours

It was drawing close to midnight now, and I was perched on the couch, underneath the dim light of the reading lamp flicking through the psychology practice papers in front of me. The tiny coffee table was covered with the sheets and colour coded notes I'd created to help me revise and get though my finals. As soon as I had my degree, I'd get a job and then me and Mathew could afford to buy some better things for his house, rather, our house now.

I heard the key jingling in the lock as I shuffled the papers together into a neater, more organized pile. My back was to the front door and I felt his presence looming behind me before his large hands settled on my shoulders. His fingers were digging into my skin causing me to wince; sometimes Mathew didn't realize his own strength.

"How was the bar?" I asked as tilted my head, feeling him beginning to nuzzle at my neck.

He always did this when I working, trying to distract me with what ever means necessary. He thought it was stupid me staying in school after we were married but I was determined to be anything but the stay at home housewife he wanted. By this time I made sure I did the work at every available opportunity when he wasn't in the house, if I stayed out late at the library he'd accuse me of cheating and that wasn't worth the pleading and convincing that he was the only man in my life.

Despite the fact me and Danny were best friends Mathew had put a stop to me seeing him anywhere outside the university. He didn't trust Danny around me and said that he saw Messer eyeing me up and I was too naïve to believe a guy like Danny would just want to be friends with a girl like me.

"You love me right babe?" Mathew whispered into my ear.

His lips travelled to the spot beneath my ear, he nipped at the skin there painfully. My body jerked and as always he mistook that for pleasure.

"You know I do," I told him, turning my head towards him.

"I need you to do something for me babe. It got a little messy at the bar." Mathew's lips were tracing along my jaw now.

I pulled away frowning at his words.

"Mathew what do you mean?" I rose to my feet, shifting the coffee table further away from the couch before turning to face him.

Mathew stood before me, his light grey t-shirt drenched with vivid red blood; it was streaked along his face and in his ash blond hair. His lip was already swelling…

I rushed toward him, checking him over, searching for the wound that was causing him to lose all of this blood. It was sticky on my hands and I found myself unable to believe that he was still standing, let alone walking and talking from the sheer amount of blood on his clothes.

"Mathew your gonna have to show me where your hurt, I can't find it and you've lost so much blood." I was already reaching for the phone, my hands shaking ready to dial 911.

Mathew's hand enclosed on my wrist, squeezing tightly causing the phone to slip from my grasp. Our eyes met as I cried out. His oak coloured eyes had never looked so cold before.

"It's not mine," he murmured.

My eyes lowered to his shirt, studying the blood intently.

"I don't understand." I whispered, feeling my chest begin to constrict.

There was too much blood on that shirt.

"It's not mine," he repeated.

I could feel my stomach churning as his words sunk in, bile was rising in my throat. I tried to take a step back, but Mathew's hand was still clasped to my wrist, pulling me back towards him.

"Whose blood is it?" I asked, trying to take a deep breath to calm myself.

I couldn't tear my eyes away from his shirt. I was already feeling light headed when he shrugged; I sagged against the back of the couch. Mathew released my arm as I did so.

"Some punk was pretending that he was one of us, you know how it is babe." I shook my head, hand pressed to my mouth as I tried to stifle the horror that was beginning to fill me up inside.

"He was pretending to be a Tanglewood, Carmen. I couldn't let the little shit get away with something like that. We needed to teach him a lesson. That asshole wasn't as tough as he pretended, he was screaming for this mother when we made him climb into that hole."

I couldn't breath, just listening to him brag was knocking me utterly sick. I didn't want to believe it, I couldn't… but the evidence was right there. Someone had lost a life threatening amount of blood tonight and it wasn't Mathew. He was leaning into me now, our faces inches apart; I could smell the beer on his breath.

"I need you to help me burn these clothes," he muttered, he was stroking the hair away from my face with the back of his hand, and I couldn't bring myself to move.

"Mathew…" I whimpered. "I can't…"

Mathew's fingers were tracing my cheekbone now. Each caress was sending chill after chill up my spine, standing face to face with him like this, his eyes looked dead.

"Please Carmen…I'm your husband." His words were almost tender.

My rational side was beginning to kick in now. There was a logical explanation for this; I knew Mathew, he wouldn't just lash out like this. He only hit out when he was provoked, given that, it didn't take much to provoke him.

I slid out from underneath his arm, reaching out for the phone again.

"We need to go to the police, you can plead self defence. The guy attacked you didn't he?" My voice was shrill now as I realized he wasn't answering me. "Right Mathew?"

He was shaking his head now, taking a step towards me, his hand outstretched. I caught sight of the bloody knuckles and I felt the air rush out of me as he spoke again.

"We buried his body in the construction site, Carmen he deserved it. He was nothing and he was mouthing off trying to be one of us."

I was staring at him aghast, the phone clenched tightly in my hands and cupped close to my chest.

"You killed him because he was trying to be one of you…You can't kill people because of a gang you and your buddies are in. Tell me you're lying Mathew!" I pleaded, feeling coldness beginning to take over my body.

I didn't know the man in front of me anymore. Covered head to toe in blood, my supposed husband. Someone's child had died tonight because of the tattoo he sported on his back. I shook my head trying to get a grasp on myself. I didn't know what to do, I couldn't speak.

"Carmen, help me burn these clothes." I stared at him transfixed; this wasn't the man I'd married.

He'd changed, or he was showing his true colours. The again so was I, I'd let Mathew get away with a lot of shit while we'd been dating but there wasn't a chance in hell I could let him get away with this.

"No… I'm calling the police."

A loud crack echoed through the air as the force of his hand hitting my face turned my head. I wavered for a second, my hand clutching the couch for support, before I clapped it to my stinging red cheek, staring at him in utter horror.

"You made me do that Carmen, you're my fucking wife, now do what I tell you to damn well do!" Mathew seethed, stripping off his t-shirt and throwing it at me.

I caught it easily; the blood was still wet, the entire shirt was soaked through.

"I won't help you cover up a murder that you committed Mathew, that kid's parents are probably out there looking for …"

His fist was closed when he hit me this time, and I fell to the floor, the carpet burning my skin as I slid against it. It took me a second to realize what had happened but Mathew's hand was already twisting in my hair. My scalp was on fire as he dragged me to my feet. My hands were on his trying to loosen the grip he had, my nails scrapping across his skin. He was yanking me towards the bath room as I struggled against his grasp on my hair.

"Get the bleach," he commanded, shoving me towards the bathroom door.

My head hit the frame and I was seeing stars as I felt the wood catch my skin and blood seeping down my face. I was shaking, head pressed to the door, eyes closed as I tried to regain my composure.

"No…"

Mathew's fist smashed into my ribs, I was on my knees as the air rushed out of me. I choked in agony knowing that something had to be broken from the fact I was struggling to breathe.

"Get the bleach bitch." Mathew was hauling me to my feet again.

I stumbled into the bathroom, slamming the door behind me and before Mathew could do a damn thing slid the bolt home. He was pounding on the door now, I could hear him screaming as I bent over the sink, trying to piece together what the hell I was going to do next. He was going to be coming through that door any second now and I had no doubt that he was going to kill me. My heart was thudding in my chest as I clutched my side.

My eyes fell on the cell phone I'd placed on the sink before I'd stepped into the bath. I clutched it tightly hitting speed dial one as I turned to see the bathroom door buckle under the onslaught of Mathew's rage.

_Pick up, please pick up. _I begged listening to the phone ring, tears leaking down my face as I watched the lock quiver under Mathew's large frame.

"_Hey."_ Danny's voice was hoarse and I knew I'd just woken him.

"Danny it's me, I need you to come over…" I wheezed. "Mathew's gone crazy and he's…"

I dropped the phone as the door burst open. I screamed as Mathew lunged for me, his face contorted in rage. His fingers wrapped around my throat, clamping off my air supply as he tore me from the shelter of the bathroom. I struggled against him, as he swung around and threw me across the room. The back of my knees hit the coffee table before I lost my balance and crashed straight through it.

"You fucking bitch, you're my wife and I swear to God Carmen, I'll make sure you never have the chance to betray me." His boot collided with my stomach as I lay there.

Glass was biting into my skin as I managed to get onto my hands and knees, choking on the metallic taste of blood in my mouth as he kept on battering my body. I rolled onto my side and caught a boot to the face. My head reeled back and I felt another blow to my head before the darkness cascaded in drowning out every antagonizing breath I was forcing my body to take.

The was a heavy knocking on the door, I tried to scream, shout, anything but the blood bubbled in my throat making it so I could barely get enough air to breathe.

Mathew's boot crashed down on the side of my head.

Stars danced in front of my eyes again and then there was nothing.


	2. Part Two: The Way That She Died

**Hey all! Thankies for all the previous reviews, I sincerely appreciate them and hope that you continuing enjoying these tidbits.**

**This chapter is set just after Carmen goes on the raid with matt, Cory and Mac to find the guys who blew up her and Flack's wedding. The previous chapter ended with Seamus Gunn pointing a gun directly at Carmen's chest and firing. So I wrote two options for the next chapter, this is the one that didn't make it into the story.**

The Forgotten Pages – Part Two: The Way That She Died

_And though time goes by  
I will always be  
In a club with you  
In 1973_

_James Blunt – 1973_

The doors to the emergency room were thrown open as Flack raced through the corridors of the hospital. His heart was hammering in his chest as the sound of his wet shoes slapping the tiles echoed through the empty hallway. He'd heard the call out over the radio, he's literally stopped breathing when he'd heard the words "Officer Down." repeating over the air waves. Somehow he'd already known it was her. Erupting through another set of double doors he came face to face with Carmen's mentor and their long term friend. Flack took one look at his face and he knew…

Mac was struggling to keep his face passive but he couldn't hide his glistening eyes away from Flack. It suddenly occurred to Flack that Mac had been crying… and Mac didn't cry. His fists were clenched by his sides, a show of restraint…

It hit him like a truck, he suddenly found himself overwhelmed as he began to piece the puzzle together.

"Mac?" he begged.

Mac shook his head and Flack found himself beginning to crumble. The back of his hand pressed to his mouth as he muttered the word "no" over and over again. He couldn't breathe; it was as if his air supply had been completely cut off. His knees buckled, Mac reached out and clasped the other man's shoulders, Flack leaned against Mac clutching his arm for support. Hot salty tears were leaking from his eyes and trailing down his cheeks, as he clenched his eyes tightly together, trying to block out the emotions he was drowning in.

"I'm sorry Don… I really am…" Mac's voice was breaking as he spoke quietly.

Don's chest heaved with deep; gut wrenching sobs as the older man held him tightly. There were no words Mac could say so he simply held on to the younger man as he broke down. It took Flack a few minutes to regain control of himself and stand back on his own two feet. His once vibrant eyes were dull and lifeless as his gaze met Mac's.

"I need… I need to see her." He stated, before swallowing hard and jamming his trembling hands into the pockets that lined his Armani suit.

Mac nodded grimly before gesturing for Flack to follow him. Each step closer to the door at the end of the hallway felt like it took a lifetime. Part of him felt compelled, driven by the need to know that there hadn't been a mistake; it really had been her who'd caught a bullet to chest. The rest of him didn't want to know, it wanted him to go back to the apartment, crack open the bottle of JD and wait for her return. She couldn't be dead he reasoned. They were getting married in a fortnight.

Mac's hand was on the door handle, hesitating before he pushed it open.

"I'll let you have a few minutes." Mac's voice was gruff as he diverted his gaze from the scene inside.

Flack found himself unable to speak instead he pushed past the former Marine and stepped into the tiny, badly lit room. He heard the door click shut behind him as Mac removed himself. Flack was left utterly alone in the silent private hospital room.

Flack's eyes were on her face as he stepped up to the cold, metal gurney laid out in front of him. His footsteps were slow and each one caused a deep stabbing pain to radiate in the center of his chest. His fingers brushed her wavy auburn locks away from her face. Her skin was barely warm under his touch, there wasn't enough heat to give him the hope he so desperately craved.

His eyes took in the expression on her beautiful features. Her head was tilted towards him, her lips parted slightly and her intense forest green eyes closed. One of her arms rested across her stomach and the other lay palm open on the gurney. He remembered her this morning, watching her breathe as she lay in exactly the same position as she did now.

He found it hard to believe that she looked so peaceful as he caught sight of the blood that was splashed all over clothes. Someone had buttoned up her blouse, but he could still see the ragged hole in her pale skin. The hole in her chest, right above her heart was the final nail in the coffin so to speak.

His heart broke as he clenched his jaw tightly, the back of his hand pressed to his mouth as tears dripped from his face and onto her lifeless lips. He braced himself on the gurney as his chest constricted before her name rolled off his tongue.

**  
**_Wish I had known that  
What seemed so strong  
Has been and gone_

"Carmen wake up." He murmured, his hand resting on her shoulder as he shook her lightly. "Please Carmen wake up."

She didn't respond to him at all. She simply lay there motionless and absent.

"Please…" he begged, shaking her harder. "Please Princess wake up."

Carmen's head rolled onto her shoulder, her cheek pressing against the freezing cold metal of the gurney. She didn't even stir at the dull thud the action had created.

Flack choked, withdrawing as his body wrenched against the wave of antagonizing pain that was rushing through every fiber of his being. Her words were in his head as she spoke softly.

She'd said she'd always be there, she promised she wasn't ever going to leave him again.

Carmen was gone, her empty corpse was laid out in front of him and the pain…

Jesus Christ the pain was killing him.

His hands were on the dormant life support monitor that was unplugged and resting on a trolley next to the gurney. It hit the wall with a humongous crash as pieces of metal and wiring exploded from it, showering the floor with its debris.

Flack's head was in his hands and he found himself screaming her name incoherently into his hands, cursing her for inflicting this anguish upon him.

Somewhere behind him the door was thrown open as his knees gave out. Strong arms encircled his body and as much as he tried to fight, he found himself unable to break free. Tears blurred his vision as his body sagged against Mac's. The older man cradled him like a child as Flack sobbed into Mac's chest pleading for him to find away to bring Carmen back.


End file.
